i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
