he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
