if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
