I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Randomize
