If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
