yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
