If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
