my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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