you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
