Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
ttyl tear gas
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize