sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
