u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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