you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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