I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
