May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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