idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
