Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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