She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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