Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
