There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
