But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
