there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
