Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
