And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
