just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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