Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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