So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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