She's JV to your varsity
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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