I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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