There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
