I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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