I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
