wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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