I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
