never play flip cup with pint glasses
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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