He disabled his match.com account in front of me
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
