the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
