fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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