I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just took my morning after pill in the library
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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