Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
