i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
