At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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