well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
