Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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