Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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