You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
