Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
