I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I am one with the molecules
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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