No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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