xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
